It's Not You...It's Me

Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me. – Carol Burnett.

I remember when I first started my Journey to Self-Love, the first thought that came to mind was to look outside myself. It is always the easiest place to start. “I need to change the world first and then everything will be perfect”. I discovered that trying to change or fix the world is like trying to change a movie by manipulating the movie screen.

To be honest with you I got really tired. I questioned: why is nothing getting fixed? Why am I not getting fixed? I realized that after so much effort, that the world as we know it is simply a screen onto which we project our thoughts. Until we change those thoughts. The movie stays the same and so does our story.

“What you think, you become!” I am living proof. If you have positive thoughts you are going to attract positive situations in your life. If like me, in the past, all of your thoughts are negative, you better get ready for a shit storm. I used to force my opinions and concepts instead of using my personal power to really change my life, with everyone and everything. I demanded their love, respect and acted like a two year old child when I felt I did not get it. I blamed everyone for my life. This person said this, she called me that…and I would simply explode like a volcano when I did not get my way. I carried a lot of armor. Ask me if I gave any love, respect, compassion or kindness in return to anyone; how could I, I never extended love and kindness to myself, how could I have given it freely to the world. We need to look at ourselves first, accept all that we are flaws and divinity. Take responsibility for our thoughts and actions. And most importantly learn that we are doing the best we can at any given time.

The world revolved around me. Sounds familiar. I was like a lion looking for her prey. I would always find a reason or someone to blame. That’s the ego’s best trick; blame someone or something else. That way you don’t have to look at yourself. And I never inquired why? I suffered, I was in pain. My mind worked similar to the mouse running the wheel: Lots of effort but it wasn’t getting me anywhere. I would continue to make the same plans and God laughed.

The first step to create personal change and taking responsibility for your self is to recognize the reoccurring patterns and/or habits in your life that no longer serve you. I started to pay attention to my patterns in my everyday life and recognized that I made them in to my life story. I operated by “habit” not by “intention”.

Year after year repeating the same story, I realized that I was not ever going to move forward unless I accepted myself for who I was and what happened to me. Self-acceptance is one of the keys that will initiate your journey towards authenticity.

Sounds easy enough right! The journey of love and change does not work without the healing power of self-love and self-acceptance. Self-improvement simply does not work without the healing power of self-love and self-acceptance.

The immense power of self-acceptance is like shining a light into your own mind which allows for spontaneous inner healing and deep personal growth to take place. For real change to happen we need to understand just how much damage we cause ourselves through self-criticism.

By letting go of self-criticism and self-judgment, the power of self-acceptance radiates throughout our very self, evoking a shift in our self-perception. When we move past judgment then the real healing begins!

The power of your mind is amazing and determines every aspect of your life. If you want a happier, more loving and successful life, you need to stay connected with your spirit. When your mind and spirit reconnects, you will become more focused and balanced. You will experience greater self-confidence, feelings of worthiness, and improved health.

Expressing your feelings positively and appropriately is necessary to ensure that your emotions are flowing through your body—otherwise they get trapped and those negative emotions can lead to illness. If you have negative feelings you need to do an inquiry on why you are feeling that way. As I began to heal, I learned that our feelings are wonderful gifts God gave us to help better guide us.

From my own experience, I know many of us live our lives carrying a thousand of pounds of negative baggage around with us filled with emotions because we think they are too painful to address. I’m here to tell you that you must address them if you want to achieve happiness and harmony—it is critical to release those emotions from your body!

The only thing I know for sure is have faith because God has a plan for you, bigger and better of what you can imagine. No matter what insane madness we fall into, God always delivers the love and peace that lies beyond.

All of us including myself are playing a part in a large transformation process. Each of us is being forced to confront whatever it is we do or even think, that keeps love away. Blocking love’s power to change our own lives, we block its power to change the world. Truly, we are bigger then all of our problems, our problems and situations are manifestations of our forgetfulness to remember who we truly are.

To achieve the miraculous experience of life, we must embrace a more spiritual perspective. Otherwise, we will die one day without ever having known real joy of living. The joy of living emerges from our experience of our true being. When we detach from other people’s opinions and projections onto us, when we allow ourselves permission to dream our greatest dreams, when we are willing to forgive ourselves and others, when we remember that we were born with one purpose: TO LOVE AND BE LOVED.

From my heart to your heart, God Bless, Tina XO